On this very day…a great man passed from this world to the next...
So why can’t I focus on the good times?
“It was two years ago today…”
The weakness of his face, the painful moans from his mouth, the disillusioned sorrow living behind his eyes…are all as vivid this very moment as they were in the days leading up to his death.
As much as I try and remember the good times, I cannot reflect on them for but a moment without recalling those devastating last days.
“I catch a glimpse of the grey ominous storm clouds…”
It’s not like life with my father was devoid of any humorous, interesting, and exciting moments… such as free tickets to Atlanta Braves games (both at the old and new stadium), season passes to Six Flags over Georgia (the story on how we got the money for those passes is just as interesting as visits to the theme park itself), reenacting famous pro wrestling matches via a backyard trampoline, cementing the front-driveway so we had a place to shoot hoops, etc…
But attempting to remember these moments is like casting your eyes skyward to breathe in a brilliant beautiful blue sky only to catch a glimpse of the grey, ominous storm clouds on the horizon. One cannot help but fear what lies within those grey puffs of fear speckled with jagged white bolts of fury. The breathtaking majesty of the perfect calm sky seems but a distant memory from a life lived long-long ago.
Hope…
But there is hope. I believe that a healthy combination of time, knowledge, understanding and life experience will guide me, slowly but surely…to a life where I understand the balance betwixt beauty and pain, suffering and salvation, mystery and majesty. I believe that by sharing more of both the good times and the bad with those around me who have suffered through a similar story…I will have no choice but to grow stronger and wiser.
In Conclusion
May Christ bless you richly, especially those of you suffering through a holiday season without the warm hand and gentle voice of a loved one to guide you through the end of another year. You are not alone dear friends…
